Twenty Years of Superheroes
(I like to sort things out. I have one thousand opinions on everything and I’ve learned that if I make a connection between them, organize them and put them on a mental shelf. I can move on. The alternative is letting them mull around while I’m trying to sleep or when I’m in line for overpriced coffee.)
A new film genre began in 2000. The Superhero movie. It’s not really family stuff, not really action. It’s something all on its own. I chose 2000 because that was the year X-Men was released. It’s the first big-budget superhero movie that debuted in the CGI era. It’s the ‘modern-era’ of the genre, which excludes Christopher Reeves’ Superman and Tim Burton’s Batman. Not knocking them, but they are outside my scope.
Not going to include a list of favorites, although I’m sure I could. These are just observations from a fan who really loved a lot of these and was also disappointed by a lot. I look at these through the eyes of someone who puts stories together and just as a fan that recognizes quality, rip-offs, and oversaturation. There is enough data to sift through after a few decades. Here goes:
X-Men sucks. None of the X-Men movies stick with you. The X-Men story is a bummer, even if the characters and actors are some of the coolest in the genre. The fact that X-Men The Last Stand and Dark Phoenix are the same damn story told thirteen years apart and they both failed says a lot. If the Disney future for Wolverine, Xavier, and Storm are to break them up and throw them in different stuff, I’m all for it.
There is only one cinematic universe. Marvel was the only studio to build out a massive franchise, movie by movie, year by year, to lead up to an Avengers mega-collaboration. To its ultimate detriment, in many cases, Marvel established relationships between these characters through super stories and made the Avengers films successful. The problem? It is just one large story and they concluded it with Endgame.
Universes can’t be rushed. DC comics and Warner Brothers jumped in with Zack Snyder and essentially created a bunch of music videos with superheroes in them. In his care, he had the biggest heroes of them all and in a rush to compete against the Avengers he threw them in a blender in one movie to go up against…Jesse Eisenberg? The plan was rushed, but somehow the movies were three hours long. My opinion? The Justice League of Supes, Bats, WW, Aquadude etc. only works in animation. Something about Superman requires him to be the sole superhero in his movies. Batman has a rich history they can reboot until the end of time. Wonder Woman’s stories could also use a set of fresh eyes. Let them be their own thing. It looks like that may happen with the new regime. We will see.
Avoid origin stories like the plague. I realize there may be newcomers to the genre as the years go by, but they still have a basic concept of a movie hero, right? You don’t have to explain what a cowboy is in every western or explore the monster’s childhood trauma in horror movies. My favorite origin stories are the first acts of Sam Raimi’s Spider-Man and Jon Favreau’s Iron Man. I think Tobey Maguire got bitten in the first five minutes. RDJ as Tony Stark made the character more interesting than the suit. Those are the rare exceptions. What stinks about origin stories now is that I can’t tell if it’s a quality offering or not, because I’m so over them as a plot. Doctor Strange, Captain Marvel? They came along so late in the Avengers story I didn’t give a shit about what got them their powers. The best origin story in recent memory? Tom Holland’s Peter Parker. They didn’t even show it. Just referred to in conversation. Make that the standard.
There is such a thing as too much CGI. I think moviegoers have figured this out. I like a lot of CG shit, especially when I’m in outer space. It’s cool. But it can also be a giant billion-dollar wallpaper where famous actors bounce around in front of it looking for eyelines. Our brains won’t allow so much of it without a tether to the real world. A mix between CG and reality is best. CG isn’t a meal. It’s like a nice sauce.
Let the directors screw around (Marvel, I’m looking at you). Logan. Deadpool. Birds of Prey. The Suicide Squad. Thor: Ragnarok. Each one of these was a fun detour into a director’s vision of the superhero genre. It won’t always work, but breathing down the creators’ necks to iron out all the individuality doesn’t work either. You can get happy accidents or dip into more adult fare. They don’t have to tell all the same jokes or end on a high note. Let them exist on their own.
It's time to go small. Marvel TV is bringing back Daredevil and the New York heroes to duke it out on the streets. Maybe Punisher, Jessica Jones, Spidey… This is where the stories in superhero movies should be in 2023. The whole Kang multiverse Marvel has planned for the next few years in the theater just feels like Thanos retread. Heroes don’t have to save existence; they can just combat villains and crime bosses and stuff. Let Thor and the magicians ride the bench and let’s see some Batman-style vigilante stories. Evil scientists. Rival factions with enhanced powers. Except Venom. Venom is dumb.
Here a few quick ones to wind things up:
Just like actresses don’t have to starve themselves to be on camera, male actors don’t have the be completely jacked. We’ll survive.
Not everything needs a sequel.
If an actor moves on, recast. Modern audiences can adjust. (6 James Bonds, 3 Spideys, 7 Batmen. We figured it out.)
Be as diverse as you can. The only problem is story. Keep moving the story and action and we’ll follow you.
Take your time. We don’t need six of these every year. Make them memorable and put them out fewer and farther between. America can barely afford milk and eggs. We can’t drop 50 bucks every other week to see a piece of crap you just slapped together to make a release window. I know it’s a financial investment to you greedy bastards, but it can still be a good movie.