PG-Thirteenification
With almost no research, I can remember that Red Dawn was the first movie given a PG-13 rating upon release, and the rating itself was created in reaction to the frightening scenes in Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom. If you are into ratings or why they exist, it was a buffer between content that was obviously for adults, and content that was obviously for children. I don’t know if rating thing is a good idea or not but that’s how it began. I propose that the creation of PG-13 has altered our culture in ways only the Law of Unintended Consequences could predict. And not just for movies. But mostly movies. Since pop culture is American culture, movies unfortunately matter.
The issue is that we don’t live in a culture where we sit down and watch an artist’s take on romance, comedy, science fiction or superheroes. Our culture is catered to us. Movies are formulaically created to get butts in seats. It’s been the practice for one hundred years. At first, adding an in-between rating seems helpful, and might add another market for the corporate monsters to sell to. Win-win, right? Well, there is a wrinkle. Because of the same rules under which we created PG-13, the times of day when these movies are shown also follow a set of rules designed to protect youngsters from seeing a bare breast or hearing a curse word.
For the most part, R-rated movies are shown in the evening. G-rated and family movies are shown during the day when kids are actually awake. Unless it’s a Pixar blockbuster, you won’t see a lot of family movies played after 8:00 pm. PG-13 movies can run all day long. Matinee, evenings. Anytime. So, if you are a soulless business behemoth and want to pour millions into making movies, you would want to opt for a rating that gets more ticket sales. That’s why so many big movies are PG-13.
But hey, is that so terrible? Just because a movie is PG-13 doesn’t make it a bad movie, right? No, of course not. But a lot of these movies don’t start out that way. What we get are softened movies that would normally be R-rated, but the sex, the stakes, the characterization, the dialogue is massaged until it is flat, vanilla, and forgetful. PG-13. Movies don’t seem to stick with us like they used to, right? Maybe this is why. Weakened adult fare might not interest you at all. Maybe you like family stuff. Fine. You should also know that family movies, animated, live-action and all the rest, can be altered to make them PG-13. There are those one or two adult jokes in there for mom and dad to laugh at. There are the one or two swears that are shocking and fun. Those aren’t cute accidents. They are there on purpose to get that PG-13. One targeted ‘shit!’ or fart noise might be all you need to change the PG to a PG-13. Gross.
The result is we have a lot of blah. We wanted to separate the buffet into different sections to please everyone, but because our culture is money and business first, our buffet is just pork chops and gravy. And I like pork chops and gravy. But not every single day for the rest of my life.
Sometimes, I want to watch Spider-Man.
Sometimes, I want to watch outer-space stuff.
Sometimes, I want to see villains get their heads blown off.
Sometimes, I want to tear up at the end of Pixar movie.
Sometimes, I want to watch a love scene that hasn’t been watered down by dummies.
It’s part of our cultural aging process. We need to grow up. I think we can handle more than we think we can handle.
We have so much room in our culture for millions of stories to be told. Some of them anyone can watch. Some are sad and dirty and sexy and disturbing and wild. There is room for family stories and kids’ stories that can be made without the watchful eye of toy corporations and ratings boards. Entertainment is one area of our culture that needs to diversify and we’d be better off for it.