I Can’t Make You Feel Better

About two months ago, I wrote one of these that was called “I Want To Make You Feel Better.”  Then there was a mass shooting.  Then another.  Then two catastrophic Supreme Court decisions. My little essay felt smaller and without enough fuel.  I never posted it. 

            All the same thoughts are still there.  I can rant about the history of America and humanity go in waves of darkness and light, traditional and progressive.  We are paying for old sins and problems still not dealt with.  I could ramble on about the notion of America being an experiment is absurd and that countries have no endings, only growing pains that are paid for with blood and suffering.  A part of me still wants to lend perspective and explain that things have been much worse and no one was calling it quits back then either. 

            I could testify that our biggest mistake may have been assuming all of our rights were set in stone and they didn’t need protection.  America is an ongoing argument.  It will never be settled, at least not anytime soon.  The same arguments since 1776. Traditional values versus progressive and inclusionary ones. The power of the states versus the power of the federal government. How to settle the issue of race and the poison of racism. Who needs what resources and how to deliver them.  Nothing new.

            We got lazy.  We watched as these things happened.  We let the kooks have too much power. We learned to stop sacrificing. We retreated. We argued about streaming services.

            But I can’t write about that.  I can’t do that. I have to let go. Why?  Something John Lennon said: “My role in society, or any artist's or poet's role, is to try and express what we all feel.” I like to think of myself as a ‘creative’, but his belief also rings true for me.  I can’t make you feel better. It’s impossible to do and wasteful to try.  I can only express my feelings.  That’s what all of these silly blogs are about anyway.  They are personal expressions and how I’ve tried to reconcile them.  I don’t review things.  I tell you about my thoughts.  The point is the pull the thought out of my head. The hope is that someone can identify with me and then, and only then, can someone feel better.  Or heard.  Both are good things.

            To thine own self be true. (I’m full of quotes today!) I’ve always loved that one and I embrace it even more as I grow older.  I’m a hopeful person and when you read whatever I put out there in the world it will be hopeful.  I will not commiserate.  I will not exaggerate reality for effect. (At least when I’m not writing jokes.)  But I have to remember that I have no way to make you feel better about things.  You will feel how you feel and that’s it.  The best I can offer is an alternative and I can only post it into the ether or weave it into a story.

            I’ll leave this one be.  I will end it with one little chunk of my original post.  It’s my specific gripe.  It is merely my feeling and please take it any way you wish:

 “My opinion is this:  It is infinitely easier to say the country is collapsing than to do something about it.  We are a fat and lazy culture. We have it pretty good comparatively.  We also don’t like doing stuff that’s not fun. Pessimism is so much easier, and funnier, too. Protecting women’s rights isn’t a barrel of laughs.  Police reform and guaranteeing the rights of people of color in every sector of society doesn’t earn a dancing TikTok video. Homelessness isn’t a party.  It takes sacrifice and maturity and giving a shit about your world and your fellow human being.  You want your rights?  Fight for them. (Even your right to party.)”