Writing Journal - Learning From the Loyalty of Hired Goons

           

          

Always make room for Statham in your movie.

             I’ve slowed down my blog stuff because I am working on my magnum opus.  For me, anyway.  It is a book (or two) that I have to write and try to put out there in the world.  Things just stated clicking this week and I have that energy you feel right at the beginning of something special.  It’s not unlike that moment on the first day of an extended vacation.  You take a deep breath, realize you have the day off, and you can see the calendar in your mind with blanks across the page.  For the next week or so, the world is open to you and you are excited by the prospects of the almighty different ahead of you.

            Taking time to plot a novel is a strange process.  You have to make your characters do stuff that makes sense, but isn’t predictable, but also isn’t too unpredictable. For some reason I thought of bad stories.  If I’ve seen this plot move before, I reconsider it immediately.  Since I usually quit a shitty novel that doesn’t grab me or just pisses me off, I relied on bad movies for my story ideas.  That is, I put my ideas up against shit movies to make sure I’m not hacky or lame or wasting everyone’s time.

            I guess I should reveal I like many crappy movies. Mostly crappy action movies. They provide a thrill and if I can ignore the alarming plot holes and ridiculous dialogue I can have fun.  It’s a lot like 80’s rock.  If you just have fun with it, there is something there for you.  If you think too deeply about the message or the idiotic lyrics, you are in trouble.

            Intentionally bad movies, or schlock or Ed Wood or Birdemic is not really my thing. I’ve learned to accept there is entertainment value when you witness the Truly Awful, but I never really make the time for those. 

            Shooter.  Last Man Standing. The Rock. Con-Air. Statham movies you’ve never heard of. The 2^nd and 3^rd Die Hard’s. Revenge stories. Vengeance stories. Bruce Willis. Liam Neeson. Nic Cage. Cars. Explosions. Paper-thin plots. Gorgeous women. Over-the-top bad guys. Horrible accents.

            These are my Saturday afternoon movies.  If I’m desperate to kill a lazy day and one of them is on TV, I toss the remote aside and I’m good for an hour. It is the 12-year-old boy inside my head who longed for more GI Joe and Star Wars playtime.  I don’t yearn for a good cry. I want excitement.  With these movies, you get plenty, however you have a lot of baggage.  It is what I hope to avoid when I’m plotting my own story.

            The first thing that jumps out at you is the question of motivation.  All stories need it, but action films only rely on a few tried and true reasons for endangering one’s life.  Duty, revenge, and money.  Duty is for cop stories and a handful of military stories.  It keeps John McClain from saying “Fuck this” and leaving when terrorists show up.  Money is the motivation of a lot of villains.  One has to separate humanity from themselves to truly blow up half the world just for a nicer home and an updated wardrobe. I always think about the henchmen.  How dedicated would you be to be earning a paycheck at the lowest rung of a hired goon ladder?  Would you really take a shot at Jason Statham after you know he’s just leveled a room full of cronies?  No, you’d get the fuck out of there and change your drawers.

            That leaves vengeance.  My wife loves vengeance movies, as, I was surprised to discover, many women do.  Vengeance is interesting because it excuses just about everything in an effort to right a wrong.  It serves as a neat plot device because your character has a well of hate and pain and extinguishes it as the story progresses. Hopefully the pain is gone once the big bad is laid to waste.  That is rarely explored in these shitty movies.  Mostly it’s a ride into the sunset with a hot girl and a smoldering pile of asshole bad guy in the background.  Guitars. Credits.

           What do I hope to learn?  Well, the best possible outcome is capturing the fun of these movies without the embarrassment of their true validity as stories.  I could also get my head out of my ass and just like what I like without shame.  That will help with my day-to-day life.  But for the story, I’m looking for something a little more substantive. But not too much.